Today’s task at Blogging U. is to audit your brand.
Well, I had to re-think why I started this blog and what I want to achieve with it. But let’s start from the beginning.
I am currently dealing with a pretty serious panic disorder, that you probably already know. This started so many years ago that I cannot even recall when that almost fatal change in my brain occurred. I’ve already told you that I have my imaginary world I often escape to from the sometimes too harsh reality. There are several stuff I don’t understand about myself and my current situation. It is also true that my strongest desire is to defeat this malicious disease as I don’t want to spend my whole life in such a desperate way.
I always thought of my imaginative sensitiveness as one of my biggest weaknesses. I never felt that this pretty strong trait of mine could make me belong to anywhere. I’ve been bullied and criticised a lot for my weirdness. I was always like why am I like that? Why can’t I be just like others? I often envied my schoolmates, for being strong enough just to decide to sit down and study hard to get better grades. I wasn’t able to do that no matter how determined I was. After a few minutes my mind just went away on its own and I couldn’t call it back. I didn’t want to be like that, it caused me loads of hardships to maintain an ordinary life.
After years of struggling, somehow I managed to change at least a bit. Or I should say hide my Ms Hyde deep within. Was it a good decision? Definitely not, now I regret it.
“I want to be the person who I was when I wanted to be the person I am right now.”
I don’t know who said this but it sums up how I feel pretty accurately.
By now, I decided that probably I should turn that ‘weakness’ of mine to my strongest point. I am a puzzle and I desire to find the missing pieces to make myself a whole person once and for all. This is the main purpose of this blog and my biggest aim in my life as well.
So what can you expect from me?
I am Iridescent, Sometimes I goof around a lot and sometimes I’m deadly serious. You can’t guess which side of mine will appear today, nor can I. As a result of this, you can find several types of posts here, also ones that I never planned to share. This is my shelter after all. I live in a fantasy world full of colours and happiness that resonates with the look of my blog. It’s like me, at first sight it may appear pretty simple and calm, still if you dig deep down you can find the long forgotten pieces of a shattered soul, still waiting to reunite again.